Playing Ukulele On The High Seas

Our Princess ship

In one of my recent posts I wrote about my snorkeling adventure in Hawaii and how it was probably my top favorite activity while visiting the islands. And it was. But I also had one other top favorite activity on this cruise that took place on board the ship itself–and that was playing the ukulele with a group of other like-minded cruisers.

Before we left on the cruise Faye and I discussed whether or not we should take our own ukuleles with us, as we had read that there would be a ukulele lesson offered during the voyage, but in the end we decided that we had enough luggage to worry about without adding musical instruments and cases to the mix, so we left them home (mine on the east coast of Canada and Faye’s in Alberta). We figured it wouldn’t be worth the effort to drag them along for just one ukulele lesson and we knew the instructor would have to have instruments for students to play, so we cruised sans our really, really nice-sounding ukuleles. Stupid decision.

Me with my new ukulele in the summer

While we were waiting to board the ship at the cruise terminal in Los Angeles we were in a line up ahead of a couple who were both carrying ukuleles. Immediately a red flag began waving in my brain.

“Oh, oh–what do they know that we don’t know?”

We started a conversation with them–were they perhaps cruise performers who were in the wrong line up?

Nope–they were a lovely couple of travelers from Utah–Steve and Shelley, and they were carrying their ukuleles with them because they liked the sound of these instruments and they wanted to be sure they got the most out of the ukulele lessons they were planning to sign up for on board.

Lessons? With an ‘s’? The plural of lesson? As in ‘more than one’?

Yep. Lessons. Definitely more than one, maybe as many as five or six.

The red flag in my brain waved more frantically. Stupid, stupid, stupid…I told you to pack your ukulele but would you listen to me, your red flag? No…you ignored me and made the wrong decision…again. Will you ever learn?

Apparently not.

Once we boarded the ship and had an opportunity to peruse the lists of activities that were going to be offered during the days at sea (four days going to Hawaii and four days returning from Hawaii), we found out there were indeed ukulele lessons offered during most of those days. All we had to do was show up; everything else would be provided for us.

There were two sessions scheduled for the first day at sea–one in the morning and one in the afternoon. Faye and I, being the geeky keeners that we are, decided to attend the morning lesson–get a head-start on our path to ukulele proficiency and eventual musical fame.

The lesson was due to begin at eleven AM so we figured if we waltzed into the room at ten-thirty we’d have our choice of the best seats in the lounge and maybe even the best ukuleles. Didn’t work out that way.

By ten-thirty the lounge where the lessons were going to be held was packed–who knew there would be other geeky keeners on board this ship with us?

We couldn’t find a good seat so we decided to eat again instead (because it had been an hour and a half since our last meal and lunch was still an hour away), and return to the lounge for the afternoon session, scheduled for two PM.

This time we were one of the first keeners there and we plunked ourselves into two comfy armchairs to wait for the instructor to arrive and work his magic.

Me with my shipboard ukulele

I wasn’t sure I’d like receiving instructions as part of a group, but I did. For one thing, there was no pressure on me this way–I was simply one of about fifty people plucking away at ukulele strings, trying to make musical sounds. For another thing, even if I was one of the pluckers hitting the wrong strings the instructor was very experienced at teaching adults; he knew not to single anyone out of the group but instead made generalized comments and suggestions when he noticed one or more of us doing something incorrectly. We knew who we were and were able to modify our fingering or strumming accordingly. And for the third thing, I at least had started learning to play a ukulele last summer–some of the students in the class had never even held one before, so I knew I wasn’t the worst player (or at least I hoped I wasn’t).

At the end of the first lesson we had to sign up if we wanted to continue learning ukulele the next day; if you didn’t sign the sheet you didn’t go back. Faye and I bowled over a couple of elderly women on our rush to the sign-up sheet, but they weren’t hurt other than a couple of bruised bums and one auburn wig gone slightly askew. We apologized to them after we signed our names to the sheet but added that they shouldn’t have been standing between us and our dreams in the first place.

We attended classes on six of our sea days, and on one of those days Faye and I went to two classes–the morning progressive beginner class number four and an afternoon intermediate class for players who thought they were ready for more intense ukulele instruction. I knew I wasn’t really ready but Faye was going and I certainly didn’t want to be left behind, so I gathered my courage and tagged along.

In the intermediate class the instructor showed us different strumming patterns and new chord progressions and a few other technical things–none of which I understood or would be able to recreate for you now, but I enjoyed the lesson anyway and did my best to keep up with the others.

In the progressive beginners classes I had no trouble keeping up. Dave, our instructor, only asked that we all began and ended together; he said that was all that really mattered in the long run. And I do think he was right about that. Who cared if the middle part sucked as long as the plunking sounds started in rhythm and ended in rhythm. Dave always made a great show of signalling to us when it was time to stop playing–counting down–four, three, two, one and STOP! He’d wave his arms above his head and pump his fists in jubilation when we ended correctly and when we didn’t, he’d say, “Good try…now one more time…” and we’d do the song again and again until we did see the waving arms and the pumping fists.

After the first day of class we knew there was going to be a concert on the final evening of the cruise and all students were invited to take part in it. Faye and I were excited; how many passengers get the opportunity to entertain other people on a cruise ship? Not too many, I think, other than karaoke singers or impromptu stand-up comedians in the bars. But we had the chance and we weren’t going to miss it for the world. Fame and fortune here we come!

During each lesson we practiced our songs and built up our repertoire. We learned quite a few chords and a couple of basic strumming techniques and we learned how to smile while we played. In the beginning Dave told us that we all looked like we were writing a difficult exam when we strummed our ukes and placed our fingers just so on the bars to make a chord. He told us we had to at least try to look like we were enjoying ourselves, for his reputation’s sake if nothing else. He had an image to maintain, he said, and what would people think if his students all looked like they had guns to their heads at the concert…so for Dave’s sake, we learned to smile during our playing, even when we plunked a wrong chord. We were like puppies, wanting to please our master and get a pat on the head or at least a fist pump in the air for our good behavior. And Dave deserved the best as far as we were concerned; he was really great.

Dave said that we would play two songs at the concert: “Tiny Bubbles” and “Aloha Oe”. We would play “Tiny Bubbles” alone as just the incredibly wonderful Princess Ukulele Masters and would play “Aloha Oe” while the silly talented Princess Hula Dancers stood in front of us (I think to try to keep us out of our rightful place in the spotlight), and performed their stupid graceful hula dance to the song.

On the second last day at sea we attended a dress rehearsal and found our spots on the stage. Luckily Faye and I are on the shorter side of tall, so we got to stand on a platform one level above the poor suckers taller ukulele players who stood on the floor directly behind the overly dramatic energetic hula dancers. We could see and be seen; “All right, Mr. DeMille, I’m ready for my close-up”.

Can you pick out Faye and me? Hint: we're holding ukuleles.

Faye and I spent our final day at sea relaxing and enjoying the ship’s meals twelve or thirteen more times. We needed our strength to perform that night and everybody knows that food is fuel for the body, so we filled up our tanks. Later in the evening we took our borrowed ukuleles and our sheet music to the lounge where our talents would be showcased. The Princess Ukulele Masters and the Princess Hula Dancers were slated to entertain the audience at ‘Who Wants to Be a Princess Star’ while the ballots of the contest were being tabulated to determine the winner. So we had a captive audience of at least every Pop Star performer’s traveling buddies, because they couldn’t find out the contest results until we finished performing and left the stage and I was determined I wasn’t going to leave the stage until the audience clapped for us…clapped really hard and really long. It could have been a long night.

Soon it was time for us to take our places again on the stage. Faye and I positioned our bodies just so, trying to catch the best angle of light, and we turned on our smiles. We were ready to play.

Dave lifted his arms and we struck the first few notes of “Tiny Bubbles” in unison and we smiled and did our best to sing along with Dave while we played. I’m not sure how the middle of the song sounded, but we ended in unison and received a wonderful ‘raised arms and pumped fists’ for our efforts. Then it was the hula dancers turn again. We played “Aloha Oe”  while they performed, and even though they gyrated and wiggled around the stage I’m pretty certain all eyes in the audience were on the ukulele players, and more specifically, on Faye and me, and most specifically, on me. I made sure I smiled as if I had just won the lottery…

Before I could say, “But I don’t want to stop playing,” it was time to stop playing. Our jobs were done. The audience had the good sense to clap for us immediately and we filed off the stage in an orderly fashion. My fifteen minutes of fame ended up being more like seven and a half minutes, so I’m thinking I have another seven and a half minutes of fame owed to me yet.

Faye and I celebrated our success with one last huge meal before we crawled into our beds for the night. The next morning we would dock in Los Angeles and fly back to Canada to resume our dreary normal lives. Our ukulele-playing days on a cruise ship were over, probably forever.

But I’m going to keep looking for my next opportunity to experience the seven and a half minutes of fame still owed to me. Any suggestions?

Defining Moments–Novel by Faye Hicks

It seems I’m on a kick this week talking about writers and about books being published online, and I  think this is a good thing–in fact, I think for the next while I might write a blog post every week or so about an ebook I’ve found that was an interesting read. There are so many choices out there that no matter what a person prefers–humor, science fiction, vampire tales, historical romance, non-fiction or chick-lit, there are free or low-cost ebooks available online to fit the bill.

Today I want to mention a novel that my wonderful sister-in-law (remember Faye–the one who braved the seas with me on our cruise to Hawaii?) published recently. This novel is titled ‘Defining Moments‘ and it is a book that I’ve read at least several times along the way to it becoming published.

In the manuscript’s early days Faye asked me to critique a draft of it and offer my thoughts and suggestions; thus began my small role in seeing Defining Moments come to fruition. So I admit up front that I’m not exactly unbiased when it comes to promoting this work, but that’s okay with me as long as I’m honest in what I write, and I am.

I enjoyed the story line and the characters in Defining Moments and can even imagine the book being made into a movie one day, hopefully in the not-too-distant future. And then won’t it be fun to say that we all knew it was destined for greatness!

Defining Moments Extended Description on the Smashwords site says this:

‘Defining Moments’ is the story of Ellie Ward, a professor with a knack for making bad decisions at life’s crossroads, often with tragic consequences. At the age of nine, Ellie accidentally discovers a time portal near her childhood home, one that opens to her in situations of extreme trauma and emotion. Passing through the portal takes Ellie back in time to the key decision points that lead to her life’s tragedies, enabling her to change those decisions and avert the crises. The downside is that she never has any idea what the specific ‘defining moments’ were, and so she never knows how much of her life she is going to have to repeat to undo a bad situation. 

River ice studies take Ellie to a remote town in Canada’s Northwest Territories, where she agrees to go along with three other people in a tiny, single engine plane to scout for ice jams. Ellie’s decision not to insist that they turn back before venturing too far from town becomes another defining moment in her life when their engine fails and they crash land in the bush. As the only able-bodied survivor Ellie’s graduate student, Brenda, must take on the burden of keeping the others safe as they wait for help to arrive. Fearing that Brenda will crumble under the emotional strain, Ellie shares her personal journal as a diversion. As the hours of waiting turn into days, Brenda immerses herself in Ellie’s autobiography, and we join with her in reading of Ellie’s multiple lives, loves, careers, passions and losses. Brenda is astonished to read that her professor has managed to go back and reverse those bad decisions that resulted in tragic outcomes. Is this actually possible, or is Ellie’s journal just a work of fiction? And if it is possible, and Ellie has found a way to rewind the clock to each defining moment in her life, will she live to get the chance to do it this time?

Here is a great picture of my sister-in-law Faye, along with a short bio about her, also from the Smashwords site:

Faye is an engineer and professor who studies ice jams in northern Canada. Over her 22 year academic career, Faye has published more than 100 scientific articles and papers and has given dozens of invited lectures to colleagues in Canada, the U.S. and even in Siberia. “Defining Moments” is Faye’s first novel. She also writes creative non-fiction on her blog at (fayehicks.wordpress.com) and instructional articles for online magazines. Faye lives on an acreage near Edmonton, Alberta, Canada with her husband, Les, and their furry family of rescued cats and dogs. Faye is currently working on her second novel and continues to work as a professor and engineer.

When I decided that I would feature Faye and her first novel in one of my posts, I thought it might be interesting to do a short ‘question’ and ‘answer’ with her, so I prepared a few questions and sent them to her in Alberta and before I could say, “My goodness, winters are cold here in Canada,” Faye answered the questions and emailed them back to me. So here they are, just as they were written and received:

1. Where did your initial idea for the story come from?

I’ve always been intrigued at how seemingly innocuous decisions can end up changing a person’s entire life.   Also, I enjoy books with just a tiny hint of the paranormal in them, so I thought it might be fun to write a story that blended these two ideas.

 2. How long had the story Defining Moments been percolating in your mind before you sat down to write it?

Years actually – I tend to write that way.  I mull things over in my mind for a long time before I finally sit down at the computer to put ideas into words.

 3. You are a professor of engineering and so is your protagonist–do you see pieces of yourself in her character?

Well – we both definitely spend way too much time flying around in small planes and neither of us really enjoys it very much!  However, Ellie is much thinner and better looking than me.  As a result, she’s led a far more interesting life.

4. How long did it take you to write your book?

In terms of time actually spent in front of the computer, it probably took me around 4 to 5 months.  However, because I wrote most of it on my summer and Christmas vacations, that 4 to 5 months was spread out over about 5 years.

5. I read a comment from one of your readers that said she is looking forward to the sequel–do you see a sequel to Defining Moments in the near future?

I’m not ruling out the possibility of a sequel some time in the future, but in the short term I have a few other stories that I’m burning to turn into novels first.

6. Who are your favorite writers? Favorite genre?

I love reading British mysteries and particularly enjoy the series by Reginald Hill, Peter Robinson and Elizabeth George.  Also, post apocalyptic novels fascinate me; two of my favorite books are Stephen King’s The Stand and George R. Stewart’s Earth Abides. I also love social science fiction especially the works of Robert A. Heinlein, Arthur C. Clark and Robert J. Sawyer.

7. Are you working on another novel? Can you tell us anything about it?

Yes I am!  My next novel is set in the future.  It’s the story of a graduate student in archaeology who has been accused of academic fraud. I guess since I am venturing into the social science fiction genre, I’ll have to start using ‘Faye E. Hicks’ as my penname!

***

So now we have a bit of insight into what inspired Faye to write Defining Moments and what she sees as the topic of her next book. Faye was also nice enough to give any readers of this blog a coupon to receive a whopping 72% discount off the price of her novel. That means with this coupon  XW97P her book will be under $2.00–not too shabby! Simply enter the coupon code at the checkout. Faye has also made 30% of the book available to download and sample without any obligation to purchase, so you’ll have nothing to lose if you decide you’d like to check it out.

Oh–if you do stop by and say hi to Faye, would you please tell her that Sylvia says it’s her turn in our online Scrabble games?  

Thanks!

Blatant Self-Promotion

First of all, let me preface this post with the statement that this is blatant self-promotion on my part. I cannot tell a lie–I want to and plan to write about the fact that I am extremely excited to have just published two ebooks on Smashwords! So if you would rather not read any further, I completely understand. Go and check out other blog writers who would never stoop to such a low level as this. Come back again in a few days–I promise my topic will not be about my own books at that time!

Still here? Okay then, let’s get to it and I’ll do my best to keep this post short.

Finally, after much editing and re-editing and even more editing I completed my ebook ‘Postcards From Home‘. My daughter read it for me and made a few suggestions and my sister-in-law Faye read it and found some typos, etc that I had missed, so after I fixed those and finalized a cover for the book, I thought I was ready to submit it to the Smashwords site.

But wait–I also had to write a four hundred character blurb about the book that would entice readers to spend their hard-earned $1.99 on my words.

I had no idea how complicated it could be to write four hundred characters! Heck, I can usually do that with my eyes closed! Of course, when I’ve actually tried writing with my eyes closed I’ve discovered afterwards that my words were gibberish because my fingers were on the wrong keys on the keyboard…so that was not a good idea to try this time, for sure.

Finally, after much editing and re-editing and even more editing I completed my book blurb. I was ready to become a famous author.

Then I remembered that I needed an ISBN in order to follow all the publishing rules. Luckily I had already applied to the Canadian agency in charge of such things and had received my ISBN prefix so all I had to do was apply for a specific number for a specific book. Easy peasy. Done.

I filled in the required information on the ‘Publish’ page, uploaded the cover page and then it was time to upload my completed manuscript and click on the ‘submit’ button.

Before I could say, “I’m an ebook author,” I became an ebook author!

That was yesterday.

Today I published another ebook; this time a free one that gives readers a chance to sample my work before they spend their money on anything else I write. I think that’s fair.

So now I’m going to share with you the links to both of my books on Smashwords. Downloading is simple, no matter if you have an eReader or if you read ebooks on your desktop or laptop; if you have any questions about how to sign up for Smashwords please let me know and I’ll do my best to help you. It’s free and only takes a couple of minutes to complete the sign-up form.

My free ebook of four short stories is titled ‘Going Home and Other Stories‘  and I would love for you to read it and post reviews of it on the Smashwords site. No strings attached.

My other ebook is titled ‘Postcards From Home‘ and it is normally $1.99, but as a special offer to my blogging friends I’m offering a coupon worth 50% off the price–that means the book is only $.99 if you use the coupon code ZM86A at the checkout before Feb 14, 2012.

If you would like to read the book and write a review of it on Smashwords please let me know and I’ll send you a coupon for a Free copy of ‘Postcards From Home‘ that is also valid until Feb 14, 2012, no strings attached, except to write an honest review of your opinion.

Okay–I’m done. Whew! That feels weird, promoting my own work. As a good Canadian this is new territory to me–we are usually such unassuming souls that we would rather be failures than resort to self-promotion. But everything I’ve read about publishing online says that the author has to spread the word because if he or she doesn’t, who on earth will? Makes sense, I suppose. It’s a new world. Get with the times. Go with the flow.

Now I’m really finished. Nothing more from me tonight on this subject. Thanks for reading my post.

If you plan to publish an ebook this year please let me know when it’s completed; I would love to have the honor of reading it and reviewing it online for you. I think the online publishing community calls that ‘writers helping writers’; I call it being neighborly.

Cheers!